Inspirational Tuesday :How much help is too much?
I Have been wrestling with this question particularly in regards to my 14 year old son who is just not achieving the grades his intelligence suggests he should – mostly due to a refusal to do homework. I have tried so many different methods to help him from positive rewards to negative consequences and to be frank nothing works. So I have taken a big deep breath and come to the conclusion that this is not something I can fix. I can gently remind him along the way of the consequences of his actions (or lack thereof) but ultimately this is a decision he will have to make and live with.
Now I am sure some of you reading this will strongly disagree with my decision and I can live with that. What I would like you to think about is where in your life you may be helping too much? Where are you taking responsibility for something that is in fact other people’s problems and are you REALLY doing that person a favor by doing so? Whether this is at work or in your personal or family life, the principal is still the same, I believe the greatest gift we can give anyone is teaching them how to stand on their own two feet and how to solve their own problems. Often also the motive for helping comes from something lacking in ourselves – we feel needed by helping – and this can muddy our judgment on whether we are truly doing what is in the interest of the other person.
This different way of looking at things unfortunately does not spawn many quotes – thousands of results for “help” none for “help too much” so I cannot leave you today with a good quote so I would just like to leave you with the question -
“Where in your life are you helping too much?”
